At home with a newborn!
Updated: Sep 14
Potete leggere questo articolo in Italiano qui.
On the 5th of August, when I left home to give birth I knew that, when I came back, we would be 3 and not 2 anymore. But I had no idea how it would be!
3 days after giving birth I was released from the hospital. When we arrived home, we just asked ourselves “And now what? 🤔”.
When you are in the hospital and you need help with the baby you just have to call the nurse and you get the help you need. Once at home, alone with a baby, is different.
Everything was calm during the first day. Our baby cried when hungry, he ate and slept. We were thinking “He is so small! He can’t even cry very loud”... and let me tell you that in a few days he learned to cry for real 😂.
During the first night however it was so hard! My baby couldn’t manage to sleep, he just wanted to stay in my arms, he was crying so I had to keep him attached to my breast all the time. In the morning I was tired, but I still felt that I had enough energy. It was all adrenaline, I believe🤔. When my husband woke up, he found me in tears. I thought I was not a good mom because I was unable to make my child sleep.
The following days, as we were getting used to the baby easy by easy, were a bit better. However, I was keeping him in my arms most of the time.
I was lucky because my husband was on vacation for 3 weeks. He helped me by changing the baby, was in charge of the bath, and he was also cooking. He was manna from heaven!
It is very important to have somebody to give you a hand. Not a hand with the baby but rather cleaning the house, cooking and doing the grocery shopping! Also, we realised how important it was to have some ready-to-eat food in the fridge as it was time-saving.
We got used to the baby rapidly 🥰. And so, the month of August flew away and soon my husband had to go back to work.
That particular day was devastating for me as I was on my own with the baby for the first time. I had no time to wash my face, I hardly managed to have breakfast, even going to the toilet was “a thing”. In the evening, when he came back home, he found me in tears, again. I was tired and I was still in pyjamas.
OOOOH YES… At the beginning, taking care of a baby in 2 is much easier than doing it alone!
Little by little I managed to create a small routine for us. When my baby was 6 weeks old I was able to take care of myself (primary needs!), to eat and to have a walk outside 🏆.
When he was 8 weeks old, in order to keep him in a safe place and have some time for myself, I purchased the Peg Perego Tatamia (https://amzn.to/2UrHKBL). It was a lifesaver! It is a 3-in-1 product: bouncer, high chair and rocking chair. Since I purchased the Tatamia, I have been using it every single day, at the beginning as a bouncer and then as a high chair. I didn’t use it as a rocking chair as my baby didn’t liked it.
It is well known that babies do not come with “instructions” and so often we, the parents, need to trust our gut-feelings. It is not all milk and honey, there are soft days and a bit more difficult days. Just remember that you need to give time to time and everything will settle down on its own.
Keep in mind that babies feel their mother’s feelings. OK, maybe they cannot feel complex emotions, but they do feel when mom is stressed. If you feel like crying or screaming then do it, but don’t do it in the same room as your baby. Put him in a safe place, as a carrycot or crib, and get out of the room. Come back when you are calm!